Taylor Swift put it best...

I don't know what I want, so don't ask me
Cause I'm still trying to figure it out
Don't know what's down this road, I'm just walking
Trying to see through the rain coming down
Even though I'm not the only one
Who feels the way I do

I'm alone, on my own, and that's all I know
I'll be strong, I'll be wrong, oh but life goes on
oh I'm just a girl, trying to find a place in this world

::homph::

I guess I deserve to feel the way I'm feeling now.

And how I'm feeling is kinda like crap.

I'm tired...

...and that doesn't just mean physically.

I'm going to pray things get better.

...including my prayer life.

::sigh::

I'm sorry, and I mean it.

There are many people that are in my life that don't get the "Mary time" they deserve. I am sincerely sorry for this, and I am trying to make this change. Today wasn't a particularly good day for me. The weather reflected much of my mood: rainy, on and off. Eh, whatever.

Then I found out that my mother is in the hospital again. She didn't even call and tell us. Nor did my father. Or sister. My brother called her to ask about school related things and was informed this way.

::turns up music and falls on bed::

::lowers head::

And today...I overslept.

Keep your coins, I want change.

First of all, summer is over.

. . .

WHAT?!

Anyway, I need to be more encouraging to those I come in contact with. I try, but I'm not to where I want to be. So I'm telling you here and now that I'm going to work harder. Sorry that was random, it's just been on my mind lately.

I've been in Searcy since yesterday. It feels weird. There are faces I won't see, and I've seen faces that I didn't think I would. I guess that's Harding for you.

I'm tired already and haven't finished unpacking.

BUT!....I was on time this morning :) I'm turning over a new leaf! Okay...maybe...I'll let you know how tomorrow goes.

And so tech week begins...

We had a 9 hour rehearsal today. And a 10 hour one tomorrow. I know, I know. Wah wah wah, right? But I'm tired! Tech week absolutely kills me. And between that and working during the day, I'm gonna be so tired. But, people, I have things to look forward to:

#1- Opening night is Friday, and it's gonna be AMAZING!
#2- Monday, July 21st, will be the happiest day of my summer, as I am going to Colorado for 4 days. AHHHH!!!

I love my friends. I love nights like tonight, where you just sit around at the diner, shooting inside jokes at each other, sharing stories and laughing so hard it feels like you're going to vomit. THAT'S good time. Am I sick to think so? Maybe. But hey, you probably wish you had friends like mine ;)

I need to stop being so inconsistent as a person.
I'll work on that.